Show me your Stars

Hey Jesse, show me your stars.

I know..I know..I couldn't resist.

We worried for nothing. Our 4th turned out great. It was everything it should be you know. Family, friends, good food and fireworks. That's the perfect recipe.

Top that off with a surprise visit from the ice cream truck and there you go.

Oh, the selection. What in the world? I remember selecting from a fudgesicle, popsicle, push up and ice cream sandwich.

Well, times have changed. Today's ice cream truck has Dora and Spiderman and anything else you can dream of shaped like ice cream on a stick.

Can't beat this.

Even better than ice cream...he came home and lit up our evening even more.

He must have been exhausted, but he didn't complain.

Sparklers...they never get old.

The show was pretty dang good for our small town. These reactions here are priceless.

"Is that the last one?" No baby, not yet.

Jesse jumped from lap to lap and enjoyed the show from many points of view.

Such an improvement from last year's Scottish Rite upper deck experience.

But it really didn't matter where we were...as long as we were together. That's all I wanted.

And we celebrated...and we sang Happy Birthday with 4th of July cupcakes and my love's homemade key lime pie...and we stayed up really late all weekend...and we laughed...and we loved. And it was so dang nice.

Christmas in July

Things are just a little out of the ordinary around our house this evening. Aunt Kelly was with the kids today, which was anything but unordinary...more extraordinary. But, Jesse had Christmas music playing in the basement tonight. Hmmmm. That was the first sign. Wow, here's the next one.

He's gone...duty calls and my love is gone. Again. It was hard to hear, especially on the eve of a holiday weekend. Very hard to hear. Problem is, I want him around. We all do. We miss him.

But there are more important things in the world going on than our little family 4th of July celebration. Not that we had a huge event planned or anything. Just us...maybe a picnic, watermelon, fireworks, maybe hamburgers and hotdogs. That's it. But, there are people that need him. I get that. I get that he would never say no, especially in this particular situation. He would never say no to this. And, no, he wouldn't like for me to talk about "this." There is a reason other than I love him that I call him "my love."

I know this one thing. I know that there is no other place on this Earth that he would rather be than right here. I know because he shows us and tells us. As he is to us, we are to him. And this is what makes it easier. So we will go on and we will celebrate. And we will hope to see him before the weekend is done. And we will send him tons of pictures and tell him how much we are missing him.

I will continue to plan a little something. I will continue to let him know that we are thinking of him every minute, every second of the day...in everything we do. I will continue to be proud of him. Because it is people like him that make my world so wonderful.

I bought this bubble machine tonight on a quick errand to Target. Needed wipes. This was just sitting there for me at the register. You know...one of those items they put there just for suckers like me to grab at the last second. Even had a large bottle of bubbles right there for me too. Well then, why the hell not?

And I brought it home. And we had Christmas and what seemed like snow in July. And it was fabulous.

Go get 'em love. We are so proud of you. Go get 'em and then hurry home so we can celebrate you.

More Amazed

She's wired tonight. Doesn't want to go to sleep. My fault...gave her cookies too late and was really curious about the Bachelorette this evening. Sure, it's a waste of time, but hey, it's my guilty pleasure (still missed who she sent home). I can't fault Jesse. Not sure what happened to the routine. What routine? Yeah, I used to be big on that. But, I guess I'm like most parents. With the first child, we have all our t's crossed and i's dotted. We leave the house fully prepared with those disposable changing pads, buggy seat covers and and endless supply of wipes. There is a routine...a time for everything....snack, nap, dinner, bed.

Then, the second child comes along and all these rules start to...well, get a little less defined. Maybe it's because it's summer. Maybe it's because we realize how quickly it all goes by. Maybe it's because we are constantly amazed by them and want to soak more time with them in. Maybe we're just tired. Who knows. Who cares. It is what it is. And how the hell do you say no to that face anyway? Nearly impossible.

Maybe I'm Amazed

The other day, I hadn't had a shower, threw on some old shorts and a t-shirt. Not even sure what we were doing, but definitely not leaving the house I guess. And Jesse looked up at me with her sweet smile and beautiful blue eyes and said, "Mommy, you look so pretty." My heart melted completely. I grabbed her up and said, "Jesse, you look so pretty too." She gave me the sweetest smile again as if I told her she was a princess. I understand how that feels, because she just made me feel like one...even though I was a mess. And I love her for that. I am amazed by her.

The other day, in spite of our Summer relaxed bedtime rules, Jonah wanted me to read him a book upstairs. Ok. We went up alone together and read one of our favorites by Eric Carle, The Very Hungry Caterpillar. And he had his snack as we watched that little caterpillar get fat for the 100th time and turn into a butterfly. And then, as usual, he brushed his teeth and we turned out the lights. "Mommy, will you lay with me for a minute?" Sure baby. He asks me every time. Even though he knows he doesn't have to. "Mommy, will you scratch my back a little bit?" Sure baby. Then, as I get up after a good scratching, "Mommy, can I have a sip of water?" Sure baby. Every single time. Exactly the same routine. I kiss him and tell him good night and he's my best boy. I love you. "I love you too." And every single time, I am amazed by him.

The other day, I was in a mad rush to get home from work and get out of the house for baseball. Running around like a crazy person gathering what we needed. I was a mess. My love reminded me on the way that it didn't matter if we were late. It just DID NOT MATTER. What was important was that we were all together and enjoying, loving each other. He was so calm. I was mad at myself for not being the same. Stupid. And as usual, I was amazed by him. I should have told him so.

I am constantly amazed that these three human beings make me feel like and strive to be a better person. Every day they keep working on me. And I'm trying every day to be more amazing for them.

So, today, I took my Friday off. Yes, I could have worked and "made up time." But today, I wanted to have an amazing day. So, I did.

Day at the park, take-out hot dogs back to the park for a picnic, Ms. Kelly joining us for hot dogs, pool...then slip-n-slide. Yes, I crammed as much in as I possibly could.

I love you, my three Amazings.

Oh, why the hell not?

My love and Jonah left this Father's Day for a while....went to the golf store. All I wanted to do was get the big stuff picked up, get myself a little ready, put Jesse girl down for a nap and start my love's dinner. But this little girl had other plans.

Oh, why the hell not? Here ya go. Knock yourself out girl.

"You want some?" "OK."

When we were done, somehow she decided to celebrate by jumping on the bed. And again, why the hell not? And look what I got. See, most people would throw this picture out. But I was so excited to see this one. I guess I could have pretended that I was going for this effect. Who cares...I love it. That's my girl in action.

At this point, forget nap. That's just not going to be easy. All my why the hell not's didn't really help matters. But again, oh well. Need to get cooking.

First, dessert. Peach and Blueberry Crumbles. Summery dish I think. Daddy loves fruit desserts. Side note...apparently, if you boil peaches for 30 seconds to a minute, the peels just rub right off so easily. It's amazing.

Not too bad. But perhaps this was a little heavy of a dessert to follow spaghetti and meatballs? Oh, why the hell not?

I think these Dads liked it just fine.

But see, my don't care attitude when it came to Jesse's nap really bit me..well you know. She passed out just before dinner. She missed the rest of the evening. She missed the Father's Day celebration. And...Jonah's putting game with his own rules...

Grandmommy and Aunt Kelly in the back yard...playing along with Jonah's rules and watching fire flies.

But, this bothered me the most. It was the clearest of clear skies I have seen in so long. The moon was beautiful. I was so upset. She's missing it. So, I took a picture of this one for her. Later, my love reminded me that there would be plenty more moons.

I really hope to make this up to you tomorrow night...my sweet little moon lover.

Appointment with a Rock Star

As a parent, at least for me, there is nothing more important than keeping your children happy and healthy. The second part of this has been on my mind so much the last two days.

I spent the entire day with my boy on Tuesday. He had an appointment with a Rock Star. Well, not literally. A Rock Star in the Speech Therapy world though. He's a well published doctor and expert in his field.....and he's right here in my city...at Children's. It took us months to see him, but it was well worth the wait. To make a long story short, the Rock Star looked at me and said something like this... "We can fix this with therapy. He does not need surgery. I want to do it here. I want my people to work with him and I want to oversee his progress." The look on my face must have revealed my pure shock. Who are you and what planet are you from? You are a Rock Star and you want to take time out of your busy days to help my boy? Again, how did we find you?

Later, as I thought of his incredible passion for what he does and true concern for my child, I was nearly brought to tears. See, all a Mom wants to do is provide this type of care for her child and sometimes it is so hard to find. When we do, it's the greatest, most wonderful type of wonderful. I just want to scream to the heavens, Thank You!! Maybe it is silly. It's just speech. There are families tackling so much worse and I understand that. We've had worse challenges ourselves. But right now, all I am thinking is that this is my baby...my boy. Everything that concerns him is a big deal to me.

I've been walking on a cloud since we left. I mean, we have a lot of therapy coming our way, juggling of time, and who knows if it can be corrected totally, but I'm good. I'm not worried anymore because we are being taken care of by a gifted Angel. I can rest easy.

I took something else with me from this experience. Huge revelation really. If we were all this passionate about what we do everyday...Wow. How wonderful this world could be. How even more wonderful.

I think Jonah will remember his Rock Star Speech Doctor when he is older. As he thinks of what he wants to do with his life, I'll tell him this, "Remember Dr. Riski? Helping or inspiring others is the best gift you can give back to this world. Do something you have passion for...something you love. And, you and the people around you will always be happy."